He Loved Me?

I will never forget the day that I found out he had loved me. He loved me as more than a warm body. He loved me for my personality, my conversation, my eyes, my smile, my comfort and my friendship. He was and is a great catch. He went out of his way to cheer me up. He took me far away from the stresses of my daily life. He walked me to my dorm. His hugs always lingered longer than a friend's but not long enough for me to enjoy. We fell somewhere between friends and lovers. I was his satellite. His shadow. He gave up his bed to me. We lay around for a whole day just enjoying each other's company. I peered at him over the sheets to hide my morning breath and acne riddled face, but it could have mattered less. That was the happiest I had been in months and after that point he gave up on me. I led him on. I frustrated him. I hurt him. I attacked him. I lost him. I had no idea.
I let go probably one of few guys that loved me purely. I didn't have the courage to get out of an abusive and difficult relationship. I realize now what a childish and foolish mistake I made by biting my tongue and hoping things would be for the best. By being a doormat and staying together for the happiness of another person, not my own happiness, I lost someone that could have been more to me than an awkward friend.
The day I found out he loved me, was the day I found out he had given up on me.
He loved me.
He loved me.
He loved me...